I have read many questions from worried daters about how to get success. They do not think about getting success on the first date. Unfortunately they are worried so much about their success that they feel they would be happy if they manage to get success after many attempts. Why such negative thinking and such low goals? Let me tell you how you can get big success on your first date itself.
Dating and worry do not go together- please understand that worrying about the result of the date will spoil your success chances. Why get worried? You are only going to meet a person of opposite sex for some time. Whether the chemistry develops or not, what do you have to lose? Why worry so much-the sky is not going to fall.
Dating and confidence is a success mix- are you a failure in life? Are you a loser? Are you not intelligent? Are you not a deserving person? Are you not smart? If you are all that, why do not you feel confident when you date? Let your partner worry, why are you worried? You have to be won over and not vice-versa. Go for the date with confidence. Your confidence will help you handle every situation.
Dating requires open and honest communication - why act and think of dialogues that are not your own. Similarly why think about lying? Be honest and open about everything. Talk as if you are talking to a good friend. Confidence should ooze out of every word you speak.
Dating needs charisma- yes; charm or charisma makes a person very attractive. Show yourself as somebody very desirable. Your body language should be that of a charismatic person.
Dating can be success if you do not worry about it and show yourself as a very desirable person. For once, let the other party worry if he/she can win you over. You will get success right on your first date.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Dates Need Adequate Product Safety Labeling
Such consumer oriented labeling as "Warning: this date may be hazardous to your emotional health" or "Lifetime unconditional love guarantee" should be easily visible on all new dates. Unfortunately the only labeling you may find on your next date may be a patch of material that says "Polo" or "Dockers." This, however, is insufficient data and fails to give even the slightest clue regarding:
* what they are made of,
* if exposed to hot water whether they will shrink or need one, or
* if they will wrinkle, fade or run from commitment.
So how do you know what you are getting into or if your potential partner will even fit your needs? How do you know if your relationship is destined for the recycle shop or if it is durable enough to weather many seasons of the heart? Although you can never take all the risk out of relationships, what you can do is attempt to put the odds of success more in your favor. Potential mates don't come with adequate product safety labeling but there are recognizable signs, "stop signs" and "warning signs", that can let you know if the "Joe Camel" you are going out with is potentially dangerous to your emotional health. These signs and signals can alert you to potential problems that can lead the unaware down the road to relationship ruin. Some of the possible "stop signs" and the potential relationship problems that they may be warning you of include:
STOP SIGN or WARNING SIGN and POTENTIAL PROBLEM
- Your date becomes very angry over little things. His anger seems disproportionate to the event. He may be a rageaholic. He may have stored lots of past anger that he will eventually aim at you.
- He is extremely critical toward himself, puts himself down. He seems to be an extreme perfectionist. In time that criticism will be directed toward you too. He may expect the unreasonable.
- He bounces checks, has credit problems, unpaid parking tickets, is always late, and makes commitments then breaks them. You're not dealing with a grown-up. You may be signing up to be his Mommy. You can't fix him!
- Your date can't have fun without drinking. He structures his social activities and free time around bars. He's a potential alcoholic and he may also be addicted to other substances.
- Your date frequently flirts with other women. He makes suggestive comments to your friends and likes "men's clubs". He may be a sex addict. You'll never feel secure. He could be unfaithful and unavailable emotionally.
- He has no long-term friends, few acquaintances and no long-term relationships. Forget the excuses, this is someone who is unable to bond with others. You won't last long either.
- He is an emotional wreck. He seems to desperately need someone to heal his broken heart and help him get his life back on track. When you've exhausted yourself nursing him back to health, he won't be there for you. That's not his role. He's the victim.
- Your date avoids talking about his past, especially his childhood. He says "what's over is over" and "I just don't think about it." He could be hiding major unresolved emotional problems from childhood. Those problems will surface with anyone with whom he gets close.
- He has just ended a several year relationship. He says he is over her and ready to start dating again. Rebound alert! He may want to be ready to date but probably isn't. He may yet go back to his ex- partner.
- Your date is uncomfortable with the idea of marriage counseling. He insists that the two of you can handle any problem that might come up. If a major problem does emerge, he won't be open to help. He may be unable to face problems or even talk about serious issues. Look out!
Ignoring these "stop signs" and the warnings that they signal can create huge relationship problems. Denying, minimizing, rationalizing, or in some other way making excuses for the other person is usually a form of self-deception. This is a way that people often set themselves up for some very painful consequence.
It is not always easy shopping for the love of your life. The product safety labeling isn't prominently displayed. But there are warning signs, stop signs and behavioral tags that tell the truth about what they are made of.
* what they are made of,
* if exposed to hot water whether they will shrink or need one, or
* if they will wrinkle, fade or run from commitment.
So how do you know what you are getting into or if your potential partner will even fit your needs? How do you know if your relationship is destined for the recycle shop or if it is durable enough to weather many seasons of the heart? Although you can never take all the risk out of relationships, what you can do is attempt to put the odds of success more in your favor. Potential mates don't come with adequate product safety labeling but there are recognizable signs, "stop signs" and "warning signs", that can let you know if the "Joe Camel" you are going out with is potentially dangerous to your emotional health. These signs and signals can alert you to potential problems that can lead the unaware down the road to relationship ruin. Some of the possible "stop signs" and the potential relationship problems that they may be warning you of include:
STOP SIGN or WARNING SIGN and POTENTIAL PROBLEM
- Your date becomes very angry over little things. His anger seems disproportionate to the event. He may be a rageaholic. He may have stored lots of past anger that he will eventually aim at you.
- He is extremely critical toward himself, puts himself down. He seems to be an extreme perfectionist. In time that criticism will be directed toward you too. He may expect the unreasonable.
- He bounces checks, has credit problems, unpaid parking tickets, is always late, and makes commitments then breaks them. You're not dealing with a grown-up. You may be signing up to be his Mommy. You can't fix him!
- Your date can't have fun without drinking. He structures his social activities and free time around bars. He's a potential alcoholic and he may also be addicted to other substances.
- Your date frequently flirts with other women. He makes suggestive comments to your friends and likes "men's clubs". He may be a sex addict. You'll never feel secure. He could be unfaithful and unavailable emotionally.
- He has no long-term friends, few acquaintances and no long-term relationships. Forget the excuses, this is someone who is unable to bond with others. You won't last long either.
- He is an emotional wreck. He seems to desperately need someone to heal his broken heart and help him get his life back on track. When you've exhausted yourself nursing him back to health, he won't be there for you. That's not his role. He's the victim.
- Your date avoids talking about his past, especially his childhood. He says "what's over is over" and "I just don't think about it." He could be hiding major unresolved emotional problems from childhood. Those problems will surface with anyone with whom he gets close.
- He has just ended a several year relationship. He says he is over her and ready to start dating again. Rebound alert! He may want to be ready to date but probably isn't. He may yet go back to his ex- partner.
- Your date is uncomfortable with the idea of marriage counseling. He insists that the two of you can handle any problem that might come up. If a major problem does emerge, he won't be open to help. He may be unable to face problems or even talk about serious issues. Look out!
Ignoring these "stop signs" and the warnings that they signal can create huge relationship problems. Denying, minimizing, rationalizing, or in some other way making excuses for the other person is usually a form of self-deception. This is a way that people often set themselves up for some very painful consequence.
It is not always easy shopping for the love of your life. The product safety labeling isn't prominently displayed. But there are warning signs, stop signs and behavioral tags that tell the truth about what they are made of.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Conversation Starters For First Dates
When dating, there really isn’t such a thing as a dating pro. First dates will always be intimidating, and to make it less daunting, you should be able to know the right things to say. It’s really difficult to say that everyone would prefer the same first date conversation topics. But to give you an idea of the whole picture, remember that your date is no different from you. If you think that you have no idea what first date conversation topics he or she would prefer, your date will have the same predicament. Both of you actually share the same fears.
Here are a few first date conversation topics that you might want to explore.
As a first date conversation topic, start by complimenting on your date’s outfit. To compliment on what your date is wearing is to make him or her feel good about themselves. Should you be able to ask where he or she bought it, you will learn something about his or her clothing style and preferences.
You can ask your date how his or her day has been. This first date conversation topic will soon progress to what he or she does for a living. Asking your date how he or she got to this position is a foolproof first date conversation topic. It will allow you to find out what things he used to do before landing his or her present job. ‘What if’ questions are also good first date conversation topics. You can ask him or her what he or she is doing now and if he or she could have any job anywhere in the world, what would it be.
Ask your date where he or she lives and has lived. This first date conversation topic will let you end up in the name-game and find out if you have common friends or acquaintances. You will discover how great bonding element this would be.
You can also ask your date where he or she would really like to live for the rest of his life. This first date conversation topic will tell you so much about his or her long-term plans.
Other first date conversation topics can range from questions about your date’s family, current events topics, or even what he or she likes doing on weekends or as a hobby.
Your date’s responses to your questions on the first date conversation topics you choose will take you from there. These first date conversation topics can be very handy for those uncomfortable silences.
Remember to try your best to overcome the jitters. Just be yourself. If you try to be someone you are not, it will not make things better. Do remember also that you need to carry out the conversation the right way.
You may know as many first date conversation topics as you do, but if you don't understand how to carry on a conversation that will make your date attracted to you, then what you talk about wouldn’t matter at all. That’s because the woman you're talking to won't feel the sincerity you wish to convey.
Be sensitive to your date’s responses to the first date conversation topic you strike. Show him or her you are interested in what he or she has to say through your body language and eye contact. A good sense of humor will do wonders to those first date conversation topics. Learn how to flirt as well and be able to learn how to deal with his or her questions also. Avoid sending mixed messages. Most of all, be comfortable with your first date conversation topic. That way, there won’t be any chance for you to be nervous at all, because you did not only handle the what, but the how as well.
Here are a few first date conversation topics that you might want to explore.
As a first date conversation topic, start by complimenting on your date’s outfit. To compliment on what your date is wearing is to make him or her feel good about themselves. Should you be able to ask where he or she bought it, you will learn something about his or her clothing style and preferences.
You can ask your date how his or her day has been. This first date conversation topic will soon progress to what he or she does for a living. Asking your date how he or she got to this position is a foolproof first date conversation topic. It will allow you to find out what things he used to do before landing his or her present job. ‘What if’ questions are also good first date conversation topics. You can ask him or her what he or she is doing now and if he or she could have any job anywhere in the world, what would it be.
Ask your date where he or she lives and has lived. This first date conversation topic will let you end up in the name-game and find out if you have common friends or acquaintances. You will discover how great bonding element this would be.
You can also ask your date where he or she would really like to live for the rest of his life. This first date conversation topic will tell you so much about his or her long-term plans.
Other first date conversation topics can range from questions about your date’s family, current events topics, or even what he or she likes doing on weekends or as a hobby.
Your date’s responses to your questions on the first date conversation topics you choose will take you from there. These first date conversation topics can be very handy for those uncomfortable silences.
Remember to try your best to overcome the jitters. Just be yourself. If you try to be someone you are not, it will not make things better. Do remember also that you need to carry out the conversation the right way.
You may know as many first date conversation topics as you do, but if you don't understand how to carry on a conversation that will make your date attracted to you, then what you talk about wouldn’t matter at all. That’s because the woman you're talking to won't feel the sincerity you wish to convey.
Be sensitive to your date’s responses to the first date conversation topic you strike. Show him or her you are interested in what he or she has to say through your body language and eye contact. A good sense of humor will do wonders to those first date conversation topics. Learn how to flirt as well and be able to learn how to deal with his or her questions also. Avoid sending mixed messages. Most of all, be comfortable with your first date conversation topic. That way, there won’t be any chance for you to be nervous at all, because you did not only handle the what, but the how as well.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Online Dating Site: The Online Cupid
It is difficult for a person to find an online dating site that could offer the best service. You need to have enough time to research because one service offered by online dating site does not necessarily mean that it will become your best choice. It will depend on some factors and votes cast upon by the people who have already tried the services of a particular dating site.
It is hard to compare thousands of available service being offered by various online dating sites. You should read reviews from different people who previously used the dating site and know its positive results.
Online dating sites refer to conventional dating companies that have expanded and applied their dating service via the Internet so that it is more accessible for people who are finding their perfect match. One of the dating service provided by online dating site are providing a database so that potential relationship could have a chance to grow with different people who are finding their match.
An online dating site offers dating services in a professional way depending on the choice of the clients including emailing, chatting, and telephone access and profiling through Internet in real time. It is important that a client aged 18 years and above has an Internet access using an Internet service provider and has registered with their chosen dating online service provider.
In this way, people can meet online because thousands of singles have registered in different online dating sites, giving them all the time to select their perfect match.
Within these services, the best way of introducing yourself is through profiling. It limits their selection process by only putting their criteria of the person’s characteristics they feel is going to be their perfect match in the future. Information such as age, location and others are accurately limited.
However, geography and schedules are not limited in professional online dating. It provides the facility so the searching processes are limited within a specific location. There are many ways for people to interact online.
Many professional online dating sites provide various ranges of featured chat rooms and services. You can try using advance features such as video or voice greeting. It increases your chance of meeting the person you like compared to a five-line letter advertisement in the newspapers personals page and attending a social gathering. Time is limited in this traditional way but in online dating, your conversations with another person have no restrictions. It is better if you maintain an interesting communication with another person, knowing him/her through email before you agree to a first conversation on the phone or having your first date.
Online dating sites have become the virtual meeting place of singles from different parts of the world regardless of their cultures, age, personalities, and profession and other characteristics. This method of dating becomes increasingly popular because it is convenient, logical, and inexpensive. Singles can chat, meet and interact where in they can find real relationships with small time investment and minimum risks. Testimonials reveal that this also lead to marriage after realizing that they are compatible and compliment with each other.
Online dating sites acts as your helpful tool of finding your real match. People should be cautious about online dating. It is advisable for them to remember important online dating tips to avoid problems and scams in the end.
- Start slowly. You need to guard from persons who seems too good to be true. It is the best way if you first communicate through email or text messaging.
- Always guard your anonymity. Make sure you don’t include information such as your last name, home address, real email address, workplace or other identifying information in your profile.
- Be sure that your email signature file is turned off or does not contain any information which can identify you. Stop communicating with persons who keeps on insisting that you give such information.
- Before giving any personal information to somebody, be sure you are comfortable with the person and known him/her in character. It is important to ask many questions and weigh if the person is telling the truth or not through his/her replies. Be selective and follow your instinct wisely. Decisions which are done carefully often give favorable results.
- Ask for a photograph to get an idea of the person’s physical appearance. Talk to him/her on the phone to know his/her communication skills but never give your number to a stranger. It is better to talk using a public phone or block your caller ID.
- It is better to protect your privacy to avoid ending up with a wrong hand.
Meet your match online using different online dating sites and avail their advantage but never forget important online dating tips. Let online dating sites be your cupid.
It is hard to compare thousands of available service being offered by various online dating sites. You should read reviews from different people who previously used the dating site and know its positive results.
Online dating sites refer to conventional dating companies that have expanded and applied their dating service via the Internet so that it is more accessible for people who are finding their perfect match. One of the dating service provided by online dating site are providing a database so that potential relationship could have a chance to grow with different people who are finding their match.
An online dating site offers dating services in a professional way depending on the choice of the clients including emailing, chatting, and telephone access and profiling through Internet in real time. It is important that a client aged 18 years and above has an Internet access using an Internet service provider and has registered with their chosen dating online service provider.
In this way, people can meet online because thousands of singles have registered in different online dating sites, giving them all the time to select their perfect match.
Within these services, the best way of introducing yourself is through profiling. It limits their selection process by only putting their criteria of the person’s characteristics they feel is going to be their perfect match in the future. Information such as age, location and others are accurately limited.
However, geography and schedules are not limited in professional online dating. It provides the facility so the searching processes are limited within a specific location. There are many ways for people to interact online.
Many professional online dating sites provide various ranges of featured chat rooms and services. You can try using advance features such as video or voice greeting. It increases your chance of meeting the person you like compared to a five-line letter advertisement in the newspapers personals page and attending a social gathering. Time is limited in this traditional way but in online dating, your conversations with another person have no restrictions. It is better if you maintain an interesting communication with another person, knowing him/her through email before you agree to a first conversation on the phone or having your first date.
Online dating sites have become the virtual meeting place of singles from different parts of the world regardless of their cultures, age, personalities, and profession and other characteristics. This method of dating becomes increasingly popular because it is convenient, logical, and inexpensive. Singles can chat, meet and interact where in they can find real relationships with small time investment and minimum risks. Testimonials reveal that this also lead to marriage after realizing that they are compatible and compliment with each other.
Online dating sites acts as your helpful tool of finding your real match. People should be cautious about online dating. It is advisable for them to remember important online dating tips to avoid problems and scams in the end.
- Start slowly. You need to guard from persons who seems too good to be true. It is the best way if you first communicate through email or text messaging.
- Always guard your anonymity. Make sure you don’t include information such as your last name, home address, real email address, workplace or other identifying information in your profile.
- Be sure that your email signature file is turned off or does not contain any information which can identify you. Stop communicating with persons who keeps on insisting that you give such information.
- Before giving any personal information to somebody, be sure you are comfortable with the person and known him/her in character. It is important to ask many questions and weigh if the person is telling the truth or not through his/her replies. Be selective and follow your instinct wisely. Decisions which are done carefully often give favorable results.
- Ask for a photograph to get an idea of the person’s physical appearance. Talk to him/her on the phone to know his/her communication skills but never give your number to a stranger. It is better to talk using a public phone or block your caller ID.
- It is better to protect your privacy to avoid ending up with a wrong hand.
Meet your match online using different online dating sites and avail their advantage but never forget important online dating tips. Let online dating sites be your cupid.
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