Dating safety tips

It's a jungle out there, and sometimes it's tricky to balance safety with having a life and enjoying it. On the one hand, you don't want to put yourself at risk unnecessarily, but on the other hand, you don't want to be ruled by fear. This is particularly important when you're dating. No one wants to think the worst of someone they're interested in dating, but there are bad people out there you need to watch out for. Here are a few tips for staying safe and sound in the dating arena.

Inform someone before you go. Make sure that prior to your date, you tell someone else what your plans are. Whether it seems melodramatic or not, you're better off safe than sorry. It doesn't have to be a notarized minute-by-minute plan. Simply mention to a friend or relative where you plan to go, and with whom.

Meet your date there. That way you've got your own transportation so you can leave at any time you wish. Driving separately makes it necessary for you and your date to spell out your plans and have a firm idea what is going on. It also rules out sudden, strange side trips that you weren't expecting.

Take protection. There's nothing like a can of mace or pepper spray in a pocket or purse. No one is saying you'll need to use it. But better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it, right? The other person doesn't have to know it's there.

A crowd is your friend. Stick to public places full of people. This one is so important, it is recommended on nearly every matchmaking and online dating site. Once you scope out the other person and are sure they're solid, then you can move on to cozy dates in private places where you can snuggle up. But for that first few dates, especially the very first date, a busy locale is definitely better. The reason is very simple: predators and crazies can't easily attack you in a well-lit place with dozens of other people close by.

Play get-to-know-you before you date. If at all possible, learn something about the person before you meet. Even if it's done through e-mail or phone calls, you can lay a lot of groundwork. Not only will you have some idea who they are and what to talk about, you'll have a good idea whether the other person is on the level. If, when getting to know them, there are warning flags or something doesn't seem right, refuse to meet them anywhere. It's that simple.

A good date understands safety measures. Someone who is genuine and has your best interests at heart will understand about safety issues and cooperate willingly. If they start complaining about reasonable safety steps (such as meeting each other in a public place), find out why. Think twice about meeting them. Don't worry about appearing rude. Tell the truth: you're uncomfortable about meeting them. How they respond to that may tell you all you need to know.

Don't forget your cell phone. It's true that talking on a cell phone all night ruins a date, but don't be tempted to leave yours at home. You never know who you're going to need to call, or when. You can always turn the ringer off, or simply refuse to answer incoming calls, but make sure you have it with you.

None of these measures is going to mark you as a paranoid weirdo; it's perfectly reasonable to want to know where you're going and what you'll be doing. It's not out of line to ask to meet in a public place, either. These days it's fairly standard procedure. Following these suggestions won't guarantee a perfect date, but it should help you have a safe one.

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