Nice Girls Finish Last

Are you a nice girl? Maybe that's why you are still single. When I say "nice" girl, I don't mean respectful, considerate of others, a loyal friend, etc. When I say "nice" girl, I mean a woman who overcompensates with men way before they have earned it. She cooks him a four-star meal and serves it to him on a gold platter, buys his favorite name brand shirts, drives two hours to get him exotic strawberries dipped in chocolate - all on the second date! Ok ladies, we've all been there. Desperately doing whatever we can to hold on to a man because we don't think we are good enough and doing whatever we can to keep the relationship going at all costs. How does it show? The guy never calls you again. We've all been there at one point in our lives.

Here is the lesson: Anything you chase in life runs away. Anything you clench with tight fists slips through your fingers. When it comes to men, this is especially the case. Why? Because he senses that you don't place a high value on yourself. He senses that you are trying to compensate for your unworthiness by giving him things prematurely in the relationship. A woman also comes across as desperate when she is overcompensating.

According to the Rules, a "Creature Unlike Any Other" on the other hand, will do the opposite. She values herself enough to know that he is lucky enough that she has chosen to be with him. She can take him or leave him! That means that she does not cook him gourmet meals during the first 6 months of their relationship. If anything, she'll feed him hot dogs on a bun with ketchup - and her dazzling smile. For dessert, she will not make Tiramisu. Rather, she will serve him a Hostess Twinkie - again with a smile. After six months, she may serve him Hamburgers and French Fries made from ground beef that she bought from the supermarket up the street. He'll appreciate it more, because she didn't hand him everything up front!

As women, we must learn how to dole out one Jelly Bean at a time in the beginning of a relationship. A woman must pace the relationship - especially in the beginning. Why? Men love instant gratification. The first thing a man sees when he sees a woman are her physical attributes. If you give him your body, your mind, your soul, your money and your devotion, all on the second date or even in the first 6 months of dating, he will lose appreciation for you because he didn't have to earn those things from you.

So remember, you are the prize. If you keep that concept in the forefront of your mind at all times, you will begin to act like a "Creature Unlike Any Other" and then he will treat you like his dream girl. Fake it until you make it if this feeling doesn't come naturally for you! Until next time, remember, Keep Him Mad About You, Not Mad At You. For dating advice and diet and diet and fitness tips, please contact me at http://howilost90pounds.com, or email me at shalisha42@aol.com

Shalisha Alston resides in Midtown Manhattan and is a Legal Assistant at an Intellectual Property Law Firm in Downtown Manhattan. She attended Yeshiva of Crown Heights for her primary education. Her collegiate education consists of Stony Brook University where she majored in Psychology and later Hunter College where she majored in History with a minor in Philosophy. S